What follows is an incoming transmission originating from somewhere between Earth and Mars:
“Greetings, fleshy Earthbeings. Cryptosporidium here, though you skin-wrapped water wads can call me Crypto-137.
I wanted to let you know that my Abducto Beam is finally ready and I’m journeying Earthwards right now. If my calculations are correct then P-Day – that’s Probe-Day to you mortal meat morsels – is set for July 28th, 2020. On that day I will officially Destroy All Humans!
I’ll see you future-victims soon on PC, PlayStation®4, and Xbox One™!”
Destroy All Humans! has already been available for pre-order on PC, PlayStation®4, and Xbox One™ from your preferred retailer, and is now also available for pre-order digitally on PC and Xbox One™. The SRP of the PC version is $49.95, and the SRP for consoles is $69.95 (PlayStation®4 and Xbox One™). Pre-order Skins available via selected channels only!
The Crypto-137 Edition, featuring a Crypto-137 figurine, a Crypto backpack, keychain, six lithographs, anti-stress toy and all in-game Crypto skins, all contained within a premium box, is available for pre-order now and has an SRP of $599.95| seven tons of mutilated cow corpse juice’s worth of Crypto currency.
Check out the new trailer of the Crypto-137 Edition: https://youtu.be/8XFKjgBIEow
The DNA Collector’s Edition, featuring a Crypto’N’Cow figurine, keychain, six lithographs, anti-stress toy, and all in-game Crypto skins, all contained within a premium box, is available for pre-order now and has an SRP of $249.95| twelve charred human femurs’ worth of Crypto currency.
Check out the new trailer of the DNA Edition: https://youtu.be/0hQ5os5wGm0
About Destroy All Humans!
The cult-classic returns and invades everything but your privacy on July 28 2020! Terrorise the people of 1950s Earth in the role of the evil alien Crypto-137. Harvest DNA and bring down the US government in the remake of the legendary alien invasion action adventure. Annihilate puny humans using an assortment of alien weaponry and psychic abilities. Reduce their cities to rubble with your flying Saucer!
One giant step on mankind!
Destroy All Humans! is a cult classic and one of the few games that will have you laughing out loud. Many games have taken inspiration from its mix of humoristic story-telling and easily accessible open world shooter action, as well as its wide range of over-the-top weaponry. But there can only be one Cryptosporidium: the human-hating alien with the voice of an angry Jack Nicholson and a shorter fuse than a xenomorph on steroids.
Step right up and enjoy the show!
O̸n̸l̴y̶ ̵D̷e̴s̷t̴r̵o̵y̶ ̸A̶l̸l̵ ̶H̷u̵m̷a̵n̸s̴!̶ ̴a̵l̷l̷o̵w̶s̴ ̶y̴o̵u̷ ̷t̷o̸ ̸e̶x̷p̶l̵o̴r̴e̶ ̷i̵d̶y̶l̴l̵i̵c̸ ̶U̴S̴ ̶c̶i̴t̴i̴e̸s̷ ̸o̸f̷ ̴t̵h̴e̷ ̷1̸9̶5̶0̷s̵,̷ ̵r̴e̷a̵d̴ ̴t̶h̴e̴ ̸t̶h̷o̴u̸g̶h̶t̴s̵ ̵o̶f̶ ̶t̶h̵e̵i̷r̵ ̷c̶i̸t̷i̶z̶e̶n̷s̸ ̸t̶o̸ ̴u̵n̵c̵o̸v̴e̴r̴ ̵t̶h̶e̸i̵r̶ ̵s̸e̷c̴r̵e̵t̶ ̷d̴e̶s̴i̸r̴e̸s̶…̷ ̵a̴n̴d̶ ̵t̴h̷e̸n̴ ̷b̶u̸r̴n̴ ̵t̷h̵e̶ ̴v̵e̷r̵y̷ ̸s̴a̴m̵e̴ ̵c̷i̶t̵i̷e̸s̵ ̴t̶o̷ ̶t̷h̸e̶ ̵g̵r̸o̵u̵n̸d̶ ̸w̴i̵t̴h̷ ̷t̸h̷e̵ ̸m̶i̵g̶h̵t̷y̸ ̵D̴e̴a̷t̸h̵ ̶R̴a̵y̵ ̵o̸f̸ ̶y̶o̸u̴r̷ ̵f̵l̵y̵i̷n̷g̶ ̷s̴a̸u̸c̵e̷r̸!̶
- Use your Abducto Beam to throw tanks around!
- Use your psychokinesis powers to crush a farmer under his own cow!
- Discover which seemingly prude ’50s housewife secretly has the hots for her hairdresser!
- Slowly batter a human to death with his own hat!
- Light up the night by zapping your enemies with teslatastic electricity!
- Take. One. Giant. Step. On. Mankind!